Moody AF

Moody A.F.

This week I have been moody a.f. – from old man cranky to frustrated and angry with moments of contentment and elated happiness. The only thing keeping me sane is I can look at the world and see my experience is a reflection of the craziest time in our lives. Nothing about this is normal, nothing.

San Anselmo is opening up in small bursts, with the Town closing some streets on the weekend to allow for dining downtown and greater movement when you are walking. I am a huge fan of closing the streets to cars and encouraging us to walk more, I am also very concerned about density and spacing. You should be also.

The desire to return to normal seems to be winning the war against creating a new normal, as I say that I think, outdoor dining in San Anselmo is certainly new along with curbside pick-up and delivery. We are innovating and changing, the pace will be slow and we will restart several times trying to figure this out. 
I refuse to rant about the lack of mask wearing I am seeing, that seems so 3 weeks ago of an issue, but as I observe our collective behavior, I see a struggle to adapt to new habits. Yet this is something within all of our control, each of us can make a choice with our actions. 

Why am I concerned? We are in the same place we started from, we know there is an airborne virus that can kill you, we don’t have a treatment protocol yet. That said, I am very optimistic a treatment protocol will be here by the Fall. There are a few companies working on this, particularly Regeneron, they developed a treatment for Ebola that is in the process of approval and are on track to be testing their Covid-19 drug on humans next week. The key to managing the risk starts with an end plan, what will we do in the worst case scenario. The cocktail approach to treatment will not work for everybody and every variation, but it will change the risk significantly and empower us to take greater risks in our behavior.

One of the common arguments I have been hearing is “are you going to live your whole life this way, in fear?” This makes me feel the full length of my 47 years on this planet, filled with so many memories and experiences I could not convey even a brief period of my life in the short period we have been sheltering in place. Can I wait a few more months and see if this treatment protocol is effective on humans? No, the truth is my actions have been riskier the last few days and our cleaning systems are a little looser. My kids are out and I know they are kids and do not understand my concern with a 3% chance of not surviving, I’d like that to be closer to a .5% chance. I am very aware of how much my risk has increased the last week. This isn’t fear, it is acknowledging the truth that even with my careful practices I am not being careful enough. Be patient, the best is yet to come.

What is really important this week? We are experiencing a revolution in America, the biggest protests of our lives are happening and we are witnessing in real time how our actions can create the changes we want in the world. I am part of this, you are part of this. We understand the systemic racism we grew up with has to change, we have the opportunity to support this, whether it is marching and protesting or having difficult conversations or simply struggling with our own bias.

I carry a lot of guilt for supporting Africa Yoga Project less the last few years. When Sean and Jen opened the Baptiste Studio in SF, I knew there was adequate Bay Area support and it was an easy time to focus on more local issues. The fact is, AYP has created more Black Yoga teachers and reached more Black people in America with Yoga than any other organization I have found. They are relentless in their commitment to community outreach and supporting underserved communities. Paige is an amazing leader who has impacted our lives in America with her actions in Kenya. I am linking 2 easy ways you can donate below, directly to AYP or you can support an off-shoot studio, Yoga Heart Kenya, that is delivering food and services in the slums of Nairobi. 

You don’t have to donate, you can like them on your social platform of choice and share their content or just educate yourself as to how they are participating in fulfilling their purpose. I know my role is to continue to listen and learn, I also know that I have a role in reminding us to support organizations doing good work from our Town to across the World and to keep saying Black Lives Matter until we are all saying it together.

Love and Masks,

PS – I am on Day 3 of our Core Challenge, that is one way to beat the blues.

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